Blog thoughts

I am still trying to figure my way around this blog thing.  I have had it for approximately two months and I just told my husband about it.  He of course responded as I figured he would.  He said it sounded like a waste of time.  Maybe he is right but what else do I have to do?  Not really, I am busy but I am trying to make time for me during the day.  I feel that throughout my marriage my time has been primarily doing for others and not enough for me.  I know my husband gets that but I don't know if he knows how important it is to have time for me.  Sometimes on his days off he will spend hours in his garage just cleaning or designing something to build....all things he loves to do and it is his time to think or NOT think.  Being a stay home mom, I don't get much of that ME time.  I know when I say it and when I write it, it sounds so selfish and I love being a mom and wife and would not have it any other way but I too need my alone time.  Some women have their bath time, some have a night out with their besties and others simply shut themselves up in their rooms and read or watch their favorite shows.  I don't have any of that and sometimes I wish I did.  I can't leave the room for five minutes without either the baby or my hubby looking for me.  My boy is in his teens and so he is in his room listening to music and texting or playing a video game.  


In church a couple of weks ago the pastor said that we are a social people by nature and need to have that network of "friends" to feel needed or wanted. As you know, I recently started a book club and maybe that book club is my way of connecting with others and establishing a bond with other book lovers.  I don't know really what it is that I am looking for or even expecting out of this book club, I just hope to enjoy some company of friends and expand my mind a little more.  Get out of my comfort zone and do things I normally would not do.  I don't have anyone to talk to about the crazy things my mind thinks or the feelings that I have, so this blog kind of helps me put them into perspective and get them out.  Hoping not to bore readers or make them think I really am crazy. 

Who knows, maybe I will find a little more of me or the person I think I should be in the process.